This is harder than I had thought!

In the last several months, I have had a few “melt downs” where I am terrified of what we are planning. It’s so different from what we are doing now and have done all our life. Do we really know what we are getting into? Will this be something we will love? What happens if we hate it, miss our comfortable predictable life?

I sold my grandmother’s weaving loom to a friend’s daughter. That was tough but it went to a good home where it will be loved. My girls were not interested. I still have the smaller floor loom that Tom gave me years ago. I sold my father’s wood lathe. I sold a Pendleton blanket on eBay. I have taken several tubs and boxes full of odds and ends stuff to the EtCetera shop here in town. We have donated several boxes of books to the used bookstore here in town. I have given lots of stuff to a young single parent friend.  All the blogs I read say that giving away your stuff is easy and you won’t miss all that stuff. Well, it hasn’t been as easy for me. Each item has a memory and holds an attachment for me.

Next on the list… sell the Subaru. I have detailed the inside and Tom washed the outside and waxed it. I took pictures and put it on Craigslist yesterday. So far, no one has called. It’s in excellent shape and super clean and only has 67,000 miles. I love this car and wish we didn’t have to sell it!

I have been painting more of the outside of the house. I have all the lower level done on the West and East and North, including the garage doors, front door and backyard door.

I also cleaned out two flowerbeds this weekend. AND, went through stuff: pictures, genealogy stuff of mine and all the stuff from Tom’s mom. I have it down to two boxes. I threw a lot away! I had thank you notes and photos from two previous jobs that I loved. I miss all the elderly folks I worked with and their families. And all the teen girls from years ago that I counseled, who are now in their 50’s. Hard to imagine. But it was a long time ago and I need to let go of this “stuff” which only means something to me.

I might be a bit crazy but when I am driving down the road during the day, going to my next appointment and I see a 5^th wheel! Or a “BOT” (Big o’ thing ie: motor home). I go crazy! I get a goofy grin and can’t stop smiling!! I wave really big! That will be me one day!! I imagine what it will be like to be free from work, free from time restraints and free to go wherever we want to go.